Truly Blessed

Wow, I can't believe it's already been a month since I last updated this thing- time sure does fly by. I just want to thank all of you who actually still read this and put up with my ramblings- especially you Rebecca since you're always checking up on this. Of course there are some "creepers" out there who read my blog. Haha, now that I think of it... a couple of years ago when I was first writing on here, a random lady left me a comment saying "I've been reading your blog and I think we should knit together sometime. Oh can I rename your dog too?"- how strange is that lol? (watch she's probably reading this right now).

What can I say though, life has been pretty hectic lately- there have been good things and bad things about it. I'm preparing for University in the fall (yes I finally decided that I am going to go) so that's been a little crazy. I'm absolutely terrified about it though and I don't know how things are going to be, and I'm pretty sure I will have no social life whatsoever. I'm going into the Concurrent program at Laurier for teaching, so that means I'll have 7 courses each semester. However, I can't wait until I'm in the third year because then I get to go to another country to teach, which I think would be an amazing opportunity for me since I want to do missions. As long as I'm making a difference in the world and in people's lives, then I'll be happy. That's my main passion in life, serving God and loving others. Anyway, I'll also be going car shopping next week, so that should be a lot of fun. I'll finally be able to go where I want without having to depend on the bus.

So, that's a little update on my life and what's been going on these past couple of months. Anyway, what I wanted to talk about in this post is how truly blessed I've been feeling lately. Things have been a little tough lately, but God has been doing some amazing things in my life and He has never left my side. Not only has God never left my side, but my family and friends haven't either. I've been so blessed with such amazing friends and family. When I'm feeling down or I feel like giving up, they know just how to pick me right back up. I've been struggling lately with how I feel about myself and how I think other people look at me- like I have no value in the world, I'm a mistake, and I'm no better then the pebble in my shoe. Obviously those are all lies from the enemy, but it's something that I've struggled with for as long as I can remember. Anyway, there are many times when I feel so broken and so worthless, and I just want to give up. But then when I pray about it and spend time with God, I'm reminded of His love and how He thinks of me. I also think of my family and my friends who do care about me, and then I don't feel so useless.

When I'm feeling unloved, people are always there to remind me that they'll always love me, and I'm so glad that God has put those kinds of people in my life. I'm so fortunate to have the family that I do- I know I always talk about how much they mean to me, but I can't begin to tell you how much I love and appreciate them. When I'm lost and confused, they're always there to give me advice and to help get me back on the right path again. A few weeks ago, I was feeling so horrible about things, and I was actually starting to panic about my life and where it was going. I just wanted to give up and I stopped caring about things that used to be so important to me. My family could see that I was not in a good frame of mind, and they knew I needed help. I was sitting in my living room one day, and my whole family came in and talked to me for more than an hour. I couldn't believe that they would set some time aside in their busy schedule, just to help me out. That meant so much to me, and I felt much better after it. There was also another time when I was up late at night, feeling really down about some stuff, and Zac came home from his fiance's to find me crying. Instead of leaving me alone (which most people probably would considering that it's not a lot of fun to hang around a person who is having an emotional breakdown lol), he made me a smoothy, and then came down and sat with me. Instead of talking to me, he just listened and let me share my heart with him. Zac and I have always been really close (he's like my best friend), and I think him just doing that made me cry even more. That was such a kind thing for him to do, and again it meant so much to me. That's what a family is all about I think- being there for each other no matter what.

My friends have also been amazing too. They're always there to help me through everything. Rebecca, you have been so great and you've helped me more than you could ever know. I am so blessed to have you as my best friend, and you know how crazy I'd be without you:p

So, basically I just wanted to thank everyone for being so awesome. I love you all!